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Thursday, December 30, 2010

Toddlers and Tiaras Season Premiere

I've talked about this show before, and this post from a year ago makes my feelings abundantly clear. I feel guilty for watching it because I feel like I'm supporting baby beauty pageants, but it's like a train wreck. A creepy, sparkly, pedophillic Christmas kind of train wreck. The season premiere last night showcased the worst parents and children I have seen.

The format of the show visits the homes of three children and documents their preparations for whatever upcoming pageant is being featured on the episode. It interviews the children and the parents, then follows the three to the pageant, switching back and forth between them. It ends with crowning and final thoughts. Last night's three were dream teams of parent and children.

1) Mackenzie - Her mother is under her control

This 4-year-old knows what she wants and she does not hesitate to kick, scream, hide in closets, and whip out her sharp tongue to get it. Mackenzie dominates, and her mother seems to know this. She doesn't try to control her. In reviews I read, everyone seems to name this mother-daughter duo as the worst in the episode and Mackenzie as the most horrible child. I disagree. Mackenzie is out of control, but it's what's you would from a 4-year-old pageant child. She has a cute and funny personality, and I think she would be as sparkly as her completely inappropriate eye shadow if her mother knew how to discipline. And maybe if she wasn't thrown into baby beauty pageants. Whatever.


I like how she really exaggerates her southern accent when she's dressed up.

2) Scarlett and Isabella - When they learn to talk, I hope they yell at their mommy

The mother with her one year old twins was priceless. Oh, no, actually, there is a price. The mother with her twins was $250,000 because that's how much she spent to get her twins started in beauty pageants. She says she decided to enter them before they were even born and has a room full of dresses that cost between $1000-$2000 each. Remember that they are babies and outgrow their dresses before the dress maker is even finished adding the jewels. They take a private jet to pageants, and she name-drops designers many times during the episode.

I can't find a video or picture of these people yet, but that's okay. They're nothing special. The babies aren't anything special. They're cute like all chubby-cheeked babies are cute, but Gerber won't be calling them for a photo shoot. The mother said she's been married more times than she wants to say and looks like a heavy smoker with tattoo'd arms and a drawn face, which we notice as she talks about the importance of facial beauty.

What made me laugh out loud was how she actually gives pep talks to her daughters. They're barely a year old. They can't even stand yet. She tells them "You need to do your best in this pageant" blah blah blah and yells at one child to look at her. This lady is delusional if she thinks she can give a pep talk to a baby, but I guess when you spend a quarter of a million dollars to play dress up with infants, the reality ship has already left the dock.

3) Danielle - 8 years old and pure evil. Nothing else.

I think this is best described with a quote.

"If I don't win, I *will* trash the hotel room."

Watch her in action. I was actually hoping for her not to win. This brat needs to be backhanded. She whined about other girls stealing her spotlight. She says she doesn't believe in beauty sleep because she's naturally beautiful. She says she doesn't like to wear makeup because she knows she's beautiful enough without it. She says she would jump on the judges if she didn't win. She ran off the stage crying when she lost supreme title. I was satisfied. Such a little biotch.

Another observation: So many of the pageant moms who babble on about the importance of physical beauty look like Danielle's mom.


I'm going to go ahead and make the assumption that they are living through their daughters.

Love,
Juliana

20 comments:

  1. I have no idea why the hell TLC broadcasts this show. It is by far the worst show on mainstream cable TV. Sure, people can make arguments suggesting that 85% of what's on Comedy Central or all the shows on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim and FX's late-night programming are the worst things on mainstream cable TV. Content wise, I would agree with that.
    However, what makes this show so bad is that it's real. The fact that these people and their lives are being glorified on TV is the most horrible thing I've ever seen!!! No offense, but you should feel guilty for watching it.

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  2. Yesterday was the first time I actually watched it. I had only seen one episode before. I don't think they're being glorified. Most of the attention this show receives is negative, and it's the negative attention that's keeping it alive I think. So many people are totally outraged and horrified like you are that it has become so well-known. If I boycott the show, it's not going to change anything. These people are still going to be crazy.

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  3. Uhm actually I think "My Strange Addiction" is the worst show on mainstream cable xD

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  4. Buety pagents are for moms living their dreams threw their kids. Makes me sick:(

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  5. I like the pageants and everything, but what I don't like is that some of the little kids take all the money and everything they have for granted where others would kill for it! I just wish that they would be more grateful.

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  6. I don't think these little kids know anything they weren't taught by their parents. If having extravagant amounts of money spent on them is all they know, they don't even realize to be grateful. The kids are brats but the parents let them become that way.

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  7. pageants are stupid and it's NOT a war of being pretty :O

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  8. I think pagents are awesome

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  9. I love pageants.I participate in them.I love when I get a crown, money and trophies.
    <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

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    Replies
    1. Other people would kill to get what you have in like, the blink of an eye.

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  10. awesome pageants RULE!

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  11. i love to watch todler and tiara i think when tha little girls are dressed up it makes them look much more pretty but it also makes them look to grown

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  12. that girl is a huge brat. Hopfully one day she'll grow up.

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  13. STUPID, RIDICULOUS,and many more adjectives I won't repeat. The money that is spent on the pageants is OBSCENE! I certainly would hate to be around these children when they grow up

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  14. i think pageants are so awesome they let the little girls dress up and have fun and i think that i want to do pageants it would be so fun putting on all that makeup and looking pretty i going to ask my mom can i be in them i want to be a beauty queen i want to win my first pageant i hope i do if you think i could win some thing on the first try i will try

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    Replies
    1. Trust me, hon, it's not that easy and you look more trashy than pretty

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  15. Bueno yo veo los concursos de belleza herroneos, las niñas tal vez se vuelvan competitivas y aprender a hacer el mayor esfuerzo para ganas pero la verdad se vuelven plásticas y huecas, la belleza exterior cuenta si lo admito yo me preocupo por ella pero en-verdad vale la pena mirase solo en un espejo y competir por ello, NO, que seriamos sin actitud, pero no una actitud superficial sino realista simpática y muy original esa es la belleza que en-verdad vale la de adentro no la exterior sino como somos como seres humanos, gracias por leerlo y lamento que este en español todavía no domino muy bien el ingles.

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  16. i for one love that show and well you are sitting at your computer talking about these girls and what they love to do. they are making a money and they are are the ones having fun. that is all i needed to say.

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  17. you are so cute i love you you are talented really talented

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  18. Toddlers and Tiaras makes kids BRATTY! all they think about is beauty and winning,Danielle is the worst i have to say,she thinks shes beautiful but in the inside shes the most UGLY! she dosent have any compassion for other people.....do those moms know thier child is acting like a brat??? those moms are just as bad as them,they talk about how beauty is important and they are actauly UGLY!

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